Thursday, March 28, 2013

Karma's a Biznatch...

We have all said it...When I have kids they are NOT going to act like that!  I have a very vivid memory of doing this exact thing.  I was 18 months pregnant with my first child and I was in Babies R Us registering for baby showers.  There was a kid in the store that seemed to be one aisle over from where I was the ENTIRE trip and all she was doing was whining...I mean every word, noise, everything out of her mouth was whining.  That is my pet peeve...I can handle a lot of stuff but whining is not one of them.  What killed me was the fact that her parents seemed oblivious to it.  They calmly answered all of her questions, demands, and statements without ever bringing it to her attention or asking her to stop!  I was fit to be tied by the time we left.  Of course my raging hormones had nothing to do with it...of that I am sure!  I finally looked at my husband and through gritted teeth stated that our daughter would never be like that!

Well the karma gods must have heard me and enjoyed a good laugh because guess who is a whiner!?  My sweet little Princess Brennan, that is who!  Whenever she is tired or sick she whines...it is just who she is and no amount of parenting is ever going to change that.  I know for a fact that if I did not tell her that whining is not ok and constantly work with her then she very well may eventually turn into that little girl at the Babies R Us.

Fast forward two years.  I am now 30 months pregnant with my son.  98% of the time my daughter is super laid back and a great kid.  She has really never had a tantrum or done anything really that concerns me about her future.  She is a dream kid which is why I can handle a little whining on occasion.  We were at a Gymboree class and another kid was having a bad day and eventually ended up pitching a major fit in the middle of class.  The mom was obviously overwhelmed.  Well instead of taking the kid out of the enviroment, the mom sat there and subjected us all to the tantrum...yay lucky us!

I called my husband after class and said something along the lines of thank god our kid is so laid back!  Again enter karma gods, laughter, and lesson teaching...will I ever learn?  Guess who pitches fits?  Mr. Tots, my second born, that is who.  I mean bloody, there must be something physically wrong with him because nothing can cause a physically healthy child to do this right?  kindof fits.  To be fair unless he is teething or has a cold he is great...the life of the party, happiest kid on the block, ladies man kindof great.  But let me tell you, if there is something wrong with him he lets you know it!  There is no build up either.  It is just bloody fits.  I always know when he has a tooth coming in because my cute, happy baby turns into monster child. 

So yes, karma is a biznatch.  I now think twice before I judge other people.  Don't misunderstand...I still judge people, I just think twice before I do.  My parenting style has not changed dramatically since having Brennan and then Caden.  They just have very different personalities.  I am more than ever a huge believer in Nature over Nurture thing.  Your kids are born who they are going to be and it is up to you to recognize their flaws and work with them to handle them in a healthy, positive way just as much as you recognize their specialties and nurture those. 

Many things have changed about me pre-children to post-children, but one thing that did not change is that I knew that I would not think my kids are perfect.  I am fortunate that 98% of the time they are happy, go lucky human beings...it could be much, much worse.    I have known some kids that have literally never in their life been told that they are wrong or maybe that their behavior was the problem.  They have grown into adults thinking that everyone else is to blame.  My kids will NEVER be those people...obviously I haven't learned my lesson.  If the karma gods are listening this is one NEVER that is nonnegotiable. 

-Rant done!

No comments:

Post a Comment